IN PRINT AT AMAZON!

FREE! King of the Roses: A Horse-Racing Mystery—Friday-Tuesday, 7/20-7/24!

“‘No’ Dialogue”? What the Hey?

I was scrolling around today and found some good cautions for us all about creating realistic story lines in our fiction. I especially like the first warning:

Stop having characters read each other’s minds by looking into their eyes!

It has often occurred to me that it’s not “the eyes” that convey emotion anyway. It’s the facial muscles around and below the eyes that make them cruel or sad or joyous. So note to self: be careful about using this trope.

Today, though, I especially want to pick up on the point that it’s okay if characters can’t always tell exactly what the other person is thinking.

Question mark in the clouds: What is "'No' Dialogue"?

Ambiguous communication opens the way for that revealing dialogue tactic, “‘No’ Dialogue.”

I’ve scoured the remains of my film-writing library (used only for one intense period in my writing life) looking for the book that introduced me to this terminology. You won’t find this phrase with search terms, which return sites about films without dialogue. In contrast, in “‘No’ Dialogue” one character refuses to give the other what he or she wants without ever quite saying so.

The technique delivers “subtext,” what’s really going on below the surface, without the characters having to stop the story to explain. At the same time, it builds tension, as the main character cannot get what he or she wants. Here are a few lines from that wonderful scene between Bud White and Lynn Bracken in L. A. Confidential (warning: I’ve ** the bad words, but you’ll still know what they are):

BUD

Miss Bracken, don’t ever try to f**king bribe me or threaten me or I’ll have you and Patchett in s**t up to your ears.

LYNN

I remember you from Christmas Eve. You have a thing for helping women, don’t you, Officer White?

BUD

Maybe I’m just f**king curious.

LYNN

You say “f**k” a lot.

BUD

You f**k for money.

LYNN

There’s blood on your shirt. Is that an integral part of your job?

BUD

Yeah.

LYNN

Do you enjoy it?

BUD

When they deserve it.

LYNN

Did they deserve it today?

BUD

Last night. And I’m not sure.

LYNN

But you did it anyway.

BUD

Yeah, just like the half dozen guys you screwed today.

LYNN

Actually, it was two.

Dialogue like this is a verbal contest—instant conflict—in which each character refuses to acknowledge what is actually being asked, which is “What kind of person are you?” because answering that question would set in motion a terrifying commitment. Yet we know from their refusals to state the obvious what it is that bothers them about themselves, what they’re struggling with behind the repartee, what they’re trying to deny.

In only one place in this exchange does Bud answer the question Lynn actually asks: “Did they deserve it today?” And when Bud finally answers, his tough-guy façade slips. “I’m not sure.” That uncertainty has been there all along, as she throws him off balance and disrupts his self-image. When his doubt emerges, it’s a surrender he didn’t plan and a giveaway to what lies ahead.

And note that we get this many-layered interaction between two people searching for the possibility of something more than what lies before them without a single reference to the look in their eyes.

Although many writing coaches don’t use the term”‘No’ Dialogue,” several suggest ways of incorporating this technique into your stories.

  • Janet Burroway, in Writing Fiction (I’m looking at the 5th edition), analyzes examples in which “[t]ension and drama are heightened when characters are constantly (in one form or another) saying no to each other.”
  • Lew Hunter, in Screenwriting 434, suggests “180-degree dialogue,” in which a writer looks for “the most obvious line a character can say,” then “flip[s] it upside down.” “See where that takes the moment,” he says.
  • Jack M. Bickham, in Scene & Structure, discusses “dialogue at cross-purposes,” in which “the antagonist either doesn’t understand what’s really at issue, or is purposely nonresponsive to what the lead character keeps trying to talk about.”

In my own case, when I’ve felt that a scene has really delivered at least some of the impact I hoped for, I’ve looked back to see that “‘No’ Dialogue” has played a role in that success.

Do you have favorite scenes where one or more of these versions of “‘No’ Dialogue” has served the story well? Share!

 

Great First Page Critique!

Writers in the Storm often supply good lessons. This is a particularly cogent first-page critiqueWoman writing that takes aim at some my worst foibles: too many metaphors, authorial intrusions, details readers don’t need, details they do need–what about you? How would you rate this first page?

NEW POSTS AT JUST CAN’T HELP WRITING! Semicolons, horse books, and backstory!

book w starsFrom Chuck Wendig’s Terrible Minds blog, a feisty post from Aliette de Bodard on the much-maligned semicolon and what it can do for your prose.

My review of Anne Clermont’s Learning to Fall for all the horse lovers out there.

A succinct how-to from Andrea Lundgren at A Writer’s Path on managing all that pesky “backstory” stuff your readers need to know without letting it kill your pace.

INTERESTED IN RESEARCH ON WRITING? CHECK OUT 3 NEW POSTS AT COLLEGE COMPOSITION WEEKLY!

www.collegecompositionweekly.comH. Bernard Hall, in the new Research in the Teaching of English, says we no longer need to ask why to use hip-hop in English classes; we need more models for how to use it well.

Rob McAlear and Mark Pedretti, writing in Composition Studies, ask students how they decide if a paper is “done.” The answer isn’t what you think.

John Duffy, in the January College English, explores “virtue ethics” as a possible replacement for consequentialist, deontological, and poststructuralist ethics in college writing classrooms.

New Shares at Just Can’t Help Writing: Stop By!

BooksDon Massenzio has tips for book formatting to make life easier for you and for your readers. Some good questions answered here.

Louie Cronin, aka Cronin the Barbarian from Car Talk, tells us about her experiences rejecting people for the show—and why we shouldn’t be downcast! She makes rejection fun!

Writer Unboxed has been on a roll recently. Here’s a great post with some clues that you might want to skip that writing contest you just found.

I weigh in on this post from Adirondack Editing, via Chris the Story Reading Ape, on split infinitives and dangling modifiers. I ignore one and screech when I find the other. Check out which is which.

Four Great Shares at Just Can’t Help Writing!

 

A writer's bookshelf

What should writers know about trademarked names or brand names? How should you handle these names in your fiction? Adirondack Editing, via Chris the Story Reading Ape, helps out!

Phoebe Quinn at A Writer’s Path has a list of seven writing mistakes that are all too easy to make—and some ideas for improving. See if you spot yourself in this list! I did.

And if, unlike me, you’ve been struggling to keep up with SEO, here’s some good news: SEO tricks we writers can let go of, from Torque.

more books for writers

Speaking of tech stuff, I found this post from Bookworks on basic tech skills for writers more than helpful. Check it out!

 

CHECK OUT THESE GREAT SHARES AT JUST CAN’T HELP WRITING!

A writer's mind: all books!

Think you know SEO? Chris the Story Reading Ape passed along this comprehensive list from Mostly Blogging: How to be Found on Google Today, 17 Powerful Tools.Some I bet you’ve never even heard of!

Then there’s How to Write a Press Release from The Happy Self-Publisher. Instructions, templates, examples galore! Help yourself!

And what about “stupid writing rules”? Colleen Chesebro at the Fairy Whisperer proposes a list of 12 Dumb Things New Writers Tell Each Other. I added one of my own. What would you add?

A FUN LIST! Do You Hear Any of These Writing “Rules” from Your Groups?

Check out “12 Dumb Things New Writers Tell Each Other.”

The "dumb writing rules" monster

The “writing rules” monster! He can go wild!

Do you have any to add? I’d add fear of the word “had” and terror of starting sentences with “and” or “but.”

AT COLLEGE COMPOSITION WEEKLY: Digital Badging as Assessment

www.collegecompositionweekly.com

In the November College English, Stephanie West-Puckett argues for “digital badges” as a means of encouraging participation among teachers and students as they design writing assessment practices that work toward social justice.

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